Fragments
by YourRhineStoneEyes
Summary: After the latest broadcast Carlos is worried about Cecil and his well being, he decides to check on him and figure some things out. (spoilers for Cassettes)


When Carlos heard the latest broadcast of his boyfriend's show it hadn't seemed completely out of the realm of Night Vale weird, not at first. Cecil did tend to forget things, forgetting he made some tapes when he was fifteen didn't seem too weird. He had found it funny and rather cute how cracked and high his boyfriend's voice had sounded on the old tapes. They had sounded normal, normal for Night Vale anyway. The only weird thing had been the honest confusion in the broadcaster's voice when he listened to the first tape, saying he remembered none of it. The confusion melded with a bit of fear and nervousness when on one of the tapes his teen self mentioned a brother. That even gave Carlos pause, Cecil had told him he was an only child. It had always just been him and his mother until she died, but he just mentioned a brother. As the tapes played on they became less funny and more unnerving. Whatever was watching the teenager intensified, came closer to him. It seemed drawn by the teen's voice as he recorded. Everything about it sounded odd and the final tape was just...It was off by all standards. Cecil sounded as tense and terrified as he had the day Strex Corp. bought out the radio station. He tried to text and call the host at the end of the show, but nobody answered, and no messages were ever given replies. He knew his boyfriend was scared, confused; Carlos knew he himself was beyond confused right now. He wanted to know what the figure had been, he felt that Cecil knew what it was, but that was the only thing it seemed like he remembered. He waited around the lab for an hour, he stalled pretending to run tests on some fungi they had found growing inside of a woman's microwave, but he was mostly just killing time until he knew that Cecil would be back at his apartment. He told his co-workers that he was tired and needed to get back home, they had heard the broadcast and knew he really just needed to go see the other man.

When he arrived at Cecil's apartment he stood there knocking for two minutes before the other man answered the door. He didn't even greet him, his black eyes looked somehow more hollow than they normally did; he looked exhausted. He simply waved Carlos inside then went to the small kitchen connected to the living room. He picked up a bottle of whiskey from the counter top that appeared like he had already started on it not too long ago.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

Cecil took a swig from the bottle, lowered it, then shook his head; his black hair falling over his face. He pushed it back out of the way with a shaking hand.

"What was that about?"

"I don't know, don't you think that I would tell you if I knew?"

His voice sounded irritated, he was shaking slightly.

"Sorry" He muttered, another drink from the bottle.

"Do you really think you should be drinking that?"

"Oh Carlos, don't you remember the rule here? If you can't just forget or ignore it, then drink to forget completely...or be re-educated."

Carlos moved closer, he grabbed the bottle out of the taller man's hand and sat it back down on the counter top.

"Damn it, we need to talk about this. I know you're scared and you can't just crush those stupid tapes and pretend that nothing ever happened."

"Who said that I can't, huh? It's my life Carlos, I can smash the tapes and pretend they never existed, I can drink and forget all about this and just go on with my life." He snapped glaring down at the younger man.

A second later he wrapped his arms around the scientist hugging him tightly.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry I shouldn't yell at you."

"You're upset, I can't blame you...Just you can't keep locking all of this away, okay? This isn't good for your sanity."

Cecil gave a weak laugh at that, he pulled away to look down at his partner.

"Darling if you've learned anything from me then you know sanity isn't much of a thing that exist around here...If you agree to stay the night with me then we can talk about this."

Carlos leaned up kissing him quickly.

"I wouldn't dream of leaving you alone after something like that."

The two went over to the couch sitting down, Cecil keeping as close to Carlos' side as he possibly could.

"Do you know what the figure is?"

Cecil shook his head.

"I don't...I do though, I know what it is, but something...That's what makes me so frustrated and scared about all of this! I remember, but I don't remember."

"We need to work through this...I could probably look around and find out about your mom, your brother, and about other things."

"That's the thing though...I-I don't want to know about any of it, I don't want to remember. I'm scared to remember or know about these things."

"Why are you scared?"

The older man placed his face in his hands, a frustrated groan escaping him.

"I don't want to know what I am, what if I died at the end? What if I'm not even Cecil Palmer, what if I'm a copy of that kid...I have his name and what he could have grown to be, but I'm not him...What if I killed him and I don't remember it?"

"Cec, come on look at me."

The radio host lowered his hands back to his lap, he turned his full attention back to the other man. Carlos placed a hand on his cheek.

"You are Cecil Palmer, the same one on those tapes. You didn't die, I know you are Cecil; you aren't some monster or a photo copy. You are the same person from the tapes, the same person who annoyed me for nearly a year, and the same one I love more than anything else. Okay, don't doubt that."

Cecil placed his hand over Carlos'.

"What about my family, why weren't they home? Did they just abandon me?"

He thought about that tape, it all sounded like something from a Paranormal Activity movie. Hearing teenage Cecil go home from the station, nobody home, and how sad he sounded about it. Hell it almost sounded like it was something that tended to happen more than just that one time. He wondered why they left, why the mirrors were all suddenly uncovered...He had questions that he wanted to bombard the other man with, but he knew Cecil had no answers. He honestly was beginning to understand just how stressed the black eyed man had to be feeling right now.

"I don't think they would just leave you."

"My mom...I thought she died, she died...Where did I hear that? I don't remember her dying, but somebody told me...Something, she's dead and I have no brother...I...God this is too hard. I'm scared, I'm...I can't handle this...I can't do this Carlos."

He wrapped his arms around the older man holding him closely, Cecil pressed his face against Carlos' chest and began to cry. He tangled his fingers in the host's hair, he wanted to hold him as close as he could and the way Cecil was slowly moving himself onto his lap he could tell his boyfriend needed the same thing. He could almost feel his boyfriend's sanity slipping away, feel him losing himself to lost memories and ominous cassette tapes and flickering figures, and haunted mirrors. Carlos could still hear the end of the last tape, the sound of Cecil being strangled until he passed out; this only made him hold him more firmly. It made him press more light kisses to the top of the other man's head, to his forehead, cheeks, nose, and lips.

"I'm here for you, I will never leave you; I won't let Strex Corp. or city council or even your own mind hurt you. Got it?"

Cecil gave a slow nod, a shaky little smile on his face as he looked hopefully up at his boyfriend.

"I love you my sweet perfect Carlos."

"I love you too"

That night he held Cecil more closely in bed that night, he whispered sweet things to him until the broadcaster finally drifted off to a very restless sleep. When he woke up an hour later crying and thrashing about he held him, kissed him, and swore to him everything would be just fine. The following morning he had stayed longer than he should have, he had stayed until Cecil faked a smile for him and told him he should get going or he'd be late for work. That morning when Carlos got back to his apartment before heading to the lab he made sure to take every single mirror out of the place and throw it in the trash. He refused to have even the slightest risk of Cecil getting hurt.


End file.
